Hurt People, Hurt People

I have heard it said that hurt people, hurt people. While I am not going to argue the validity of that statement, I will say that I have been hurt by more prideful people then hurt people. Especially in the past year or so. You see I have come to realize that people who are prideful choose pride over character every time. Having held certain men in high regard and esteem that were supposedly wise and honorable men, I put a great deal of trust in their wisdom and friendship. Truth be told I thought of them as my family! Now on the other side, I see how I was wrong. No, this is not one of those hindsight being 20/20 things. More a realization that truly honorable men admit when they are wrong or make a mistake and most importantly APOLOGIZE! I can't tell you how important it is to own your mistakes, it is! But, that pales in comparison to seeking forgiveness. People will hurt you and you will hurt people, yes you will hurt people. When you do, don't look to defend yourself, whether you were right or wrong is not relevant. What is relevant is the feelings of the hurt person. Want to be a selfless person in life and do the right thing? BE QUICK TO SAY "I AM SORRY". Deep down none of us want to hurt others, so why are we so quick to jump to our own defense? PRIDE, yes that ugly little demon of PRIDE. Proverbs 11:2 says, 2 When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom. In all honesty, it is easy to admit messing up, true humility comes in the wisdom of seeking forgiveness. Recently, I was asked how someone could reconcile with this verse in Mathew 15, 23 “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, 24 leave your gift there in front of the altar. First, go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift. This was quite ironic because this person was supposed to be responsible for holding the individual who hurt me accountable. Now as the result of my looking for closure and healing without the reconciliation I so desired, I was being asked the one question I could not answer myself on behalf of an individual who played a role in my own hurt. I would like to say I had a clear cut definitive answer but the truth is, I do not. The struggle is real and has caused a great deal of despair and sadness at times. It has improved for the most part, but only when my thoughts are not reflecting on this. The crazy thing is I know that on their end this there is probably given little to no thought. What have I learned from all this? Be humble and apologize often and quickly. The longer you hold onto to your apology the worse it gets. Don't trust anyone, OK, I am joking, a little, though I would say that hearing someone's heart and knowing their character is important in order to trust someone. I know this too will pass and overtime healing comes, though I will always remain sad at that thought of this all. The truth is, as crazy as it may sound, I am thankful for this pain. Because it has removed the scales of ignorance from my own eyes and allowed me to be much more sensitive and aware, seeing people as worth more than my own PRIDE!